Burglar 02 - The Burglar in the Closet by Lawrence Block

Author:Lawrence Block
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Published: 2011-03-12T06:00:00+00:00

“But I’ll bet you know what you like.”

“Sometimes. I don’t like that many paintings, but I liked this one, so much so that I can’t get it out of my mind. The owners say they don’t want THE BURGLAR IN THE CLOSET

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to sell it, and then it occurred to me that I could find the artist and see what else he’s done, but how would I go about it? He’s not in the phone book, Grabow that is, and I don’t know how to get hold of him.”

“So you called us.”

“Right.”

“I wish you could have waited until late in the day. No, don’t apologize, I should be up by now anyway. Are you just going through the book and calling every gallery you can find? Because you must own stock in the phone company.”

“No, I—”

“Or maybe you’re rich. Are you rich?”

“Not particularly.”

“ ’Cause if you’re rich, or even semi-rich, I could show you no end of pretty pictures even if Mr.

Grabow didn’t paint them. Or Ms. Grabow. Why don’t you come on down and see what we’ve got?”

“Er.”

“Because we haven’t got any Grabows in stock, I’m afraid. We’ve got a terrific selection of oils and acrylics by Denise Raphaelson. Some of her draw-ings as well. But you probably never heard of her.”

“Well, I—”

“However, you’re talking to her. Impressed?”

“Certainly.”

“Really? I can’t imagine why. I don’t think I ever 152

Lawrence Block

heard of a painter named Grabow. Do you have any idea how many millions of artists there are in this city? Not literally millions, but tons of ’em.

Are you calling all the galleries?”

“No,” I said, and when she failed to interrupt me I added, “You’re the first one I called, actually.”

“Honest? To what do I owe the honor?”

“I sort of liked the name. Narrowback Gallery.”

“I picked it because this loft has a weird shape to it. It skinnies down as you move toward the rear. I was beginning to regret not calling it the Denise Raphaelson Gallery, what the hell, free advertising and all, but calling it Narrowback finally paid off. I got myself a phone call. What kind of stuff does Grabow paint?”

How the hell did I know? “Sort of modern,” I said.

“That’s a surprise. I figured he was a sixteenth-century Flemish master.”

“Well, abstract,” I said. “Sort of geometric.”

“Hard-line stuff?”

What did that mean? “Right,” I said.

“Jesus, that’s what everybody’s doing. Don’t ask me why. You really like that stuff? I mean, once you get past the fact that it’s interesting shapes and colors, then what have you got? As far as I’m concerned it’s waiting-room art. You know what I mean by that?”

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“No,” I said, mystified.

“I mean you can hang it in a waiting room or a lobby and it’s great, it won’t offend anybody, it goes nice with the décor and it makes everybody happy, but what is it? I don’t mean because it’s not representational, I mean artistically, what the fuck is it?

I mean if you want to hang it in a dentist’s office that’s sensational, and maybe you’re a dentist and I just put my foot in my mouth.

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